Hypocrite Master
by DownerLithium
Summary: The journey of regeneration and more, told through the writings of one Zelos Wilder, chosen of Tethe'alla . Sheelos, eventually. PG for..Zelos. My wierd sense of humor applies. RR! Spoilers! Millions of them!
1. I feel very privileged

Disclaimer: I don't own ToS!!! Or the characters! Or the nirvana lyrics im using for titles! Or half of my soul…what?! I sold it for the Sox!

A/N Important notices:

_italics_ entry

plain scene

**bold **date/flashback

2. I just hate trying to keep track of real dates, so I'm just goin by days in relation to each other or events, where they are etc. I can't think of a month just yet, but if I do, I'll put it in instead. Plus, if you were in a rush, you write nothing for date…at least I think Zelos would… But anyway, here's my fic. RR

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**20 days till Seles' Birthday**

_I'm trying hard to find ways to give up this whole Chosen thing, short of killing myself. Thank Martel! I'll be normal! I'll be able to friking be myself for once! People think I'm either stupid, shallow, a pimp, or nothing more than the Chosen! I wanna be treated like a NORMAL person! Seles, my half-sister, is a better choice, and not only because she's a girl. She has the guts and grit and spunk and…want. She'd make a great Chosen. I, on the other hand, hate every second of this job. I mean, since I'm a boy, I'm totally useless, cept to get picked by the Oracle to go find some girl I don't know (they wouldn't pick ANY of my hunnies…so who DOES that leave?) so I have the off-chance of getting a girl chosen. So much fun. Plus the fact that nobody even treats you like anything more than a title. Then there's the fact that the Pope HATES me. Not like I want to be liked by that asshole, but he's made my life a living HELL. Then again, if dad had just left things alone, maybe nothing would have happened after all. Oh of all hell, I hafta go eat breakfast now. Bet it's something fancy like French toast. Don't people ever listen? All I want is bacon and eggs! Oh well._

Zelos quickly combed his long red hair and admired himself in the mirror before he flew down the stairs, pink vest flapping wildly behind him. He sat down at the giant table as his butler brought out a silver platter with breakfast on it. Two pieces of French toast with some sausages and orange juice. Zelos smiled, closing his violet eyes a moment, before he spoke grinned widely.

"French toast! I love French toast!" he said happily as the food was put in front of him. The food looked absolutely perfect and delicious...for three seconds. Until he scarfed every bite down. He inhaled everything in front of him, thanked the butler, and ran back up stairs to a dull red book, lying open on the table.

The butler simply smiled, and walked off to do some more household chores, mainly sorting the presents from the Hunnies in three piles: Burn, Save, Send present back (reserved for Hilda/ Seles).

_It WAS French toast! I could smell it from here! I hate French toast. Anyway, in case you didn't realize it yet and you're a spy for that Pope, I'm Zelos Wilder. A long list of titles goes here, but I hate all of them. Honestly. And if I tell people, they'll kill me for treason or something. Not like it's a bad thing, but I hafta give this job to Seles first, cause I owe her. Her life has sucked quite a lot, almost as much as mine! I mean, she's locked in an abbey for the rest of her life and her mom's dead too. She didn't do it, so why does **she **have to pay for it? But as soon as she is chosen…she'll be happy, like she deserves to be. Although… This whole chosen thing does sucks don't wanna make her suffer by accident…I think I should look into what the girl chosens have to do a little carefully, next time I'm in Sybak. Wouldn't hurt. I'll just say that some hunny sent an awesome present and offered to help her with history homework as a thank you! They'll buy that! Hmm…who do I know in Sybak…_

**19 days till Seles' Birthday**

_Still trying to find away to give this to Seles. It's not going well. But I'm going to try to help it. Seles' birthday is in 15 days. I'm going to try as hard as possible to send my Cruxis crystal to her as a present. That way, if I do die, she'll officially be tapped as chosen, and then everything will work out. All I need to do is find a way to ship/visit her 'forbidden abbey' on her birthday and make sure she gets the crystal. Not as easy as it seems, the way things are. I'll probably just send it when I go to Sybak, so they can't track it._

_I found out the name of the sole hunny in Sybak. Her name's Chelsea and she works at the inn. She sent me a present a week ago, really. So I'll do her homework as a thank you. That should convince my dad to let me leave for there. Usually, he hates me leaving. He has a pretty good reason, though. He's afraid something bad could happen and I'll die. Good point. Only place he really likes me going to is Altamira, and that's cause he likes gambling too. And the hunnies, of course. Everywhere else and I hafta get his permission. I like my dad, for all his faults._

_He's got my hair, only shorter and with a beard. He also has my awesome purple eyes. He's a bit chubby, but no one can tell him that without being really sorry. He has a knack for rambling and boring half the nobles to tears! It's one of the funniest things any of us have ever seen. Also, he's a charmer for sure! He can get any woman to fall in love with him just in one conversation! Course, that isn't always a good thing, but technically, it's the oracle's fault for picking my mom and not Seles'. If it had just picked her…then everyone would have been happy._

_I don't remember much of anything about Seles' mom. She was only important for three years. From what I do remember, she had blue eyes and light red hair. She may have even been part elvish, I think. She had ambitions and dreams, like most normal people. Hers however, were more grand and important. And one of them was for Seles to be a chosen. Of course, that didn't work AT ALL and the whole situation just messed up EVERYTHING!_

_On the subject, I guess I'll talk about my mom now. She had light blonde hair and blue eyes. I know her name was Mylene…I just…feel better calling her mom… She looked nice, according to pictures. She was skinny and beautiful, because you hafta say that, don't you? She loved talking and demanded attention. If I can remember… I don't wanna talk about her death right now…_

Zelos sighed as he wrote. He paused for a moment, making sure nobody was in the room that shouldn't be. Seeing no one, he sighed again, then continued to write.

_She loved being rich and had huge plans set up for herself. Not that they included me. Or anyone cept HER. She absolutely hated me. Hell everyone did. And she KNEW I wasn't supposed to be there. She knew I wasn't supposed to even EXIST! And that's not all! She hated Seles' mom, because dad cheated on her for the other girl. Of course, if she actually KNEW my dad, instead of shacking up with him because he was the chosen, she'd of known that he'd cheat on her eventually! In fact, he'd been cheating on her the WHOLE time, from day one! Honest to Martel! She should have seen this entire mess coming! _

Zelos shook with anger as he wrote the sentences down. He just sat frozen for a moment, maybe two. Then he went downstairs for a drink of some iced tea, to calm him down. He sat on the couch for quite a while. He looked up at the clock, which read 11:00. He looked outside, and saw nothing but night. He finished his tea, left it in the sink, and crawled back upstairs. He saw the words he had written on the page, and stared at them a moment. He decided to write just one more sentence.

_She was right._

**17 days till Seles' Birthday**

_Well that was fun. I hadta convince my dad so I could go to Sybak. Took a LOT of work! Plus the old man wouldn't stop talking about his new slut…I hafta say goodbye to Hilda, Princess of Meltokio, and founder of the Zelos Hunny Association (ZHA). Otherwise, she'd probably start complaining to me about me cheating on her. How can I? I'm not her boyfriend anyway! And she founded an association of groupies anyway so it's her fault. Oh but whatever. Wish me luck! How can you? You're a freaking piece of paper! Whatever…_

Zelos marched out of his giant yellow mansion. He passed by a few members of ZHA and gave them a wink, hearts in eyes and all. The girls giggled, blushed, and then went back to talking about Zelos. Zelos shook his head and laughed, continuing his morning walk.

Hilda showed up before he got to the castle, however. He smiled a bit, and she just sighed happily as she walked over, fanning herself.

"Hello, my dear Royal Hunny. You look awesome today! Not that you ever don't...but whatever!" Zelos said, hearts in his eyes, which cause Hilda to laugh awkwardly.

"You say the same thing everyday, Master Zeloos!" She smiled back, elongated os and all. She sounded like a valley girl, but she didn't care. She just stood there smiling for maybe five minutes before he started talking again.

"Hilda I gotta go to stuffy Sybak for Chosen business... sucks horribly. My dad's making me! Honest to Martel! I'll be back in like two weeks or something. Don't find another hottie while I'm gone or anything!" He smirked. She laughed. They talked a bit longer, about only they know what, until Hilda walked off because of a maid. She look positively pissed, but walked away anyway.

"See ya in a week, Zelos!" She said as she ran off. Zelos waited ten seconds before he ran back to his mansion and then to his room.

_It worked! I'm goin to Sybak guilt free! Thank MARTEL for Hilda's obsession with me. I bet she has posters of me in her room now. Oh well. Doesn't matter. I'll write more when I get there. Now, I gotta long ass walk ahead, so ciao._

**15 days till Seles' Birthday**

_Made it to Sybak! I'm in the inn right now. The guard is downstairs. I'm making that asshole stay there until I need to leave. If he reads what I've written about mom and dad. Well it won't end well, that's for sure! Anyway, tommorrow I'm going to the giant library to see the materials about the chosen and such._

_I'm telling you that bridge is a pain in the ass! It just seems to go on forever. A neverending bridge. That'd be something, wouldn't it?! Man that thing takes HOURS to cross! And it's made with 3,000 exspheres, too! I mean, those could be better used to protect PEOPLE or guards or something, but we used em for a bridge. There hasta be other ways to power things! And they don't even LOOK that great either. I'm sure there's more reasons…ehh._

_But anyway, this is Sybak! Home to almost all the unlucky half elves not in Exire. They're locked in their labs forever. Maybe since the day they were born. It's absolutely horrible what they put half elves through around here. Specailly the way the Pope treats them. He drags them like freaking cattle. He's come up with all these strict caste laws and arrests, possibly executes half elves for minor offences. Although...the way the world is nowadays, maybe it's better for the half elves that they're not allowed out. True it's harsh! But it's much better than the crap that NORMAL people have to go through…or maybe not…but it is unfair that they are stuck here by law, I'll give that much._

Zelos stopped writing and looked outside. He was very bored. It is true that Sybak has a certain knack for putting people to sleep, but certainly not that boring, right? Anyway, Zelos was hungry after two days of eating nothing but crappy sandwiches the guard made. So he walked out of the inn and entered the University, looking for the Café. Eventually, after entering five labs and helping a student with his math homework by accident, he found the wonderous café.

A few students were already drinking coffee. They were all talking about their lessons and teachers. One of them was doodling a skeleton on his homework. A girl sitting near the door recognized the Chosen. She gave him a wink and a grin. He smiled a bit and waved. After a brief schmoozing moment, Zelos remembered he was hungry and walked over to the clerk.

"Hiya! Get me…two fried shrimp please! Thank you!" He smiled as he waited for his beloved shrimp. When they arrived, he paid the clerk 3 gald too much, but he didn't notice as he sat down at another table. He wolfed down the shrimp in what must have been a Tethe'allan record. He smiled to himself, sadated for a moment. After about a half hour of lying there and thinking about the wonders of shrimp, he smiled again and walked back to the inn.

_Had some Fried shrimp. This place has the best I've ever tasted some! Honest! It was absolutely…well…delicious is an understatement. Why can't the chefs at Meltokio make some like this?! _Zelos sighed as he closed his notebook and waited for this boring night to end.

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A/N Quick pre-next chapter thanks to Quirkjuice for the details about Zelos' mom! Thank you very much! I doubt I would have looked for that myself! 

Btw, this is my first pairing fic ever! I'm a bit worried I'll screw it up! But it'll be fun. Btw, Seles' birthday will just happen to be two days before meeting Lloyd et al. (why two, you'll see) PLEASE RR! Even if it's criticism! Or flames! I need something to tell ghost stories by!


	2. And Mend it With You

Disclaimer: Blah blah blah. Don't own Tales of Symphonia, the characters, the lyrics, or my dignity.

A/N Thanks to:

Quirkjuice: Thanks again for the mom info! And for being my first reviewer! Thanks a lot! Really!

Freakyleaf: thanks! Yeah..forgot to run it through checker…oh well!

Here's chapter two! A bunch of entries at once for now, cause we hafta get into the game, don't we!

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**14 days till Seles' Birthday**

_I'm writing in this in between looking through this giant library for Chosen information. So far, I'm coming up empty. And I've looked through…_Zelos stopped writing and looked at the sizable pile of books. He did some quick finger math and came up with a guesstimate. _About twenty books! At this rate, I'm going to be here till I turn 30! And what good will that do?! _He sighed as he quickly finished flipping through the book he was on, Magical Healing Plants. He slammed the books he had down on the table and groaned. _If I was a book about a chosen…I'd be about Spiritua!_ He instantly jumped up and scanned the shelves for anything with the word Spiritua in it.

After a half an hour of searching, he danced victoriously. _Finally found it! Man I hope this thing is useful! It took hours to find…and gonna take hours to read. Oh well. Not like I'm complaining. I mean, I'm not stupid or anything, it's just…well, they think I'm some sort of retard and steal answers and cheat on tests and what not. And if I let down that image, then everything else falls down too. But no one seems to be here, so I guess I'll read this thing._

Zelos studied the book very carefully, looking for specific remarks to what Spiritua had to do. After about four hours of doing nothing but read and doodle (little hearts and girls, for occasions when someone DID walk in), he sighed and closed the book.

_There was nothing really useful. Just about how she opened seals and made pacts with the angels and spirits. I already knew that! I've been learning about the locations of seals and what I might have actually had to do at them since I was at least five! What I need to know is if anything bad happened to HER during this journey, not what she had to do. Some desians, and that's all it looked like. My sister could take care of them easily…I bet they are hiding something! But...no choice…I'm gonna need to visit one of those half elves in a lab tomorrow. It's closed by now. _

Zelos doodled one more picture of an angel before he walked outside, instantly smiling.

**13 days till Seles' birthday**

_Alright! I did it! I went down to the labs to talk to the half elves. Those labs are more like dungeons…somebody needs to fix this somehow...but they won't. There's a reason behind the labs…I'm sure of it. It's painfully obvious._

_Anyway, I got the 'head elf', whose name is Foloro, to agree to do research on the Cruxis Crystal. Of course, they insisted they couldn't harm the Chosen of Mana by accident, over some unuseful and unnecessary research, so I offered them to ship it somewhere else: an abbey. Didn't tell them it was where Seles lives..but I think they figured it out. I guess, a bit like me, they missed a boat or something and couldn't figure why it was important…or maybe they just chose not too. Whatever the reason, they've agreed to send letters to Seles from here! Not only that, but they'll cover up the sending of the crystal! I'm so happy I could cry! And believe me, this doesn't happen often! Soon as I can, I'm sending off this crystal and a letter. _

**12 days till Seles' Birthday**

_I guess I should spend more time talking about Seles. Seles is my half sister. She's got light red hair and sparkly blue eyes. She gets sick a whole lot, so when I do sneak out to go visit…she's always sick then. So sick, she can't leave bed. But when I' m not there, I've heard she's tough as nails and strong and not hopeless. I've begun to think she's faking it, but I highly doubt that. Actually…a few times she hasn't been sick and she called me brat the whole time. She's almost 14, turning it in…woah! 12 days! Gotta hurry with this letter, the way the mail goes these days!_

Zelos ripped out a piece of paper and wrote down her address and name. He froze instantly. He just forgot everything he had to say…everything he meant. He sat there staring at the not so blank piece of paper for almost an hour. To put in words everything he had to say and explain what he was doing would take more guts and eloquence than any one person would, much less the Chosen, possessed. So many ideas and thoughts and random ramblings flew through his head. He sighed and took a quick drink of some iced tea. He went outside for a walk (number of addresses received from hunnies: 5).

He came back. He sat down. He picked up the pen and wrote barely anything. He figured it'd be enough.

**_Dear Seles,_**

**_I hafta write this really quickly. You can't show it too ANYONE, ok? I promise this will make everything all right. I'm sorry you've been suffering, sick, or locked away so long. But everything will change soon._**

**_Something important is in this letter. I can't tell you exactly what it is. I just promise you this much: It'll fix everything._**

_**Your brother,**_

Zelos 

(some fancy seal goes here)

_Wrote the letter. Cruxis crystal is safely inside the box…thing. Luckily for me, the lab is closed. Again. So now I have to wait until tomorrow. I'm so excited, I can't wait for this to end! I'll be free! And able to walk down the street without four girls trying to schmooze! I mean, the attentions nice and all, but these people just piss me off._

_There are fairly strong odds that sending the Crystal won't do jackshit. And I'll still be the chosen. And Seles still won't. But it'll all work out. There HAS to be a way for this to work. There just has to! Come on…think of something! Anything! Why am I asking you for anyway?! You're just a notebook! Is this the same as me talking to myself? I think I need to lie down…_

**11 days till Seles' Birthday**

_I sent the letter. Nothing more to say. _

_Since I said I'd be gone for two weeks and I hafta use it all up, I hafta waste the next couple days in my 'favorite' place, Altamira! Joy all around. _

_I hope Seles gets the letter by her birthday…_

_

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_

A/n I haven't played in a bit and don't wanna mess up game facts. So now I hafta go through the whole thing over and over. So these chapters are gonna get a bit spaced out. But it's ok! Man, writing these can be a pain huh?


	3. It's fun to lose and to pretend

Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah. Don't own Ship. Or Tales of symphonia and the characters for that matter.

A/N sorry for delay. Midterms. But, thanks to a massive coke binge, I have returned.

Thanks:  
Freakyleaf: thank you again!  
Iron Spirit: yeah…I thought some of the stuff he said led to pity. Specially due to one of the skits. But oh well. 

Here comes chapter three: Altamira!

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**9 days till Seles' Birthday**

_Finally! Here in Altamira at last! How I missed it. Stupid guards. They got lost and wouldn't let ME lead. Figures. And by the time we're here, it's freakin 1 o clock in the mornin! Everything's closed. Stupid operating hours. It's weird for me to be here now, anyway. Usually, I'm only here in winter. I hate Meltokio when it's cold…specially if it happens to snow. It's only happened once since then, and I still managed to feel like crap._

_I mean, every other 15-year-old was outside, havin snowball fights and goin sledding and…buildin snowmen. But not me. Oh no. Can't go outside in the snow anymore. Can't have fun. Stupid title! Had to ruin EVERYTHING! It ruins snow for Martel's sake! What…what's the point…_

Zelos stopped writing. Not out of emotional overload, but because of footsteps. Guard footsteps. Coming up the stairs. And towards his room. Zelos stashed his notebook under his mattress and pulled out a magazine. Just as he flipped three pages, the guard marched his way in. The guard looked at the magazine's title and shook his head. He looked around the room for an assassin, a poison, anything as an excuse for wasting time. Finding nothing out of place, the guard just took a small book and left the room.

Zelos sighed. "Stupid guards...what the hell was he lookin for anyway…" He then got his notebook got out and scrawled some more stuff.

_If anyone were likely to destroy me…it'd be these guards, not some random idiot assassin. They take orders from the pope. The only reason he hasn't killed me yet is…well I don't even know. But these guys…they'd just get executed...the Pope would keep his job…and make the next chosen's life a living hell. Unless it's Seles. Then everything would work out just the way he…and almost everyone else…wanted it._

_If I ever get out of this mess that is my life, the first thing I'll do is get rid of that Pope…even if it kills me._

**8 days till Seles' Birthday**

_ Woke up early. Still hafta wait nother five minutes to get to the beach. Thank god for the beach! Must…stay…up…and run to beach. Beach beach beach/ I love the beach. I just stand there and sit there in the sand and these two chicks come over…ahh now that's the life. Guess I hafta leave this here. Oh well. Like I can't just write when I get back! Ooh! Beach is open now! See ya notebook!_

Zelos bounded down the hotel and ran directly into a rather large woman on the way. He muttered a quick sorry as he countinued rushing towards the beach. He finally got there. He sat down on the sand, inches from the water and smiled. A few girls stared at him. He looked over at them and winked. They gushed and bounded down the beach too. He kept on smiling, the girls kept on gushing, and the jealous boyfriends nearly pounded the living snot outta Zelos for 'moving in on their action'. Zelos, being the smooth talker that he was managed to weedle his way out of that sentence.

He wound up burried up to his neck in the sand instead. The girls walked off with their boyfriends, and they looked back winking.

It took an hour long operation to get himself out of the sand, finishing only when aided by the Altamira chapter of ZHA. Now he sat on the beach again, staring at the shore for hours. He stopped on occasion, sure, to stare at a cute hunny or two. He even went swimming for a little while. He spent every moment until sundown on the beach. He finally had to leave to get himself some good Popcorn shrimp from a vendor.

Eventually, after a long, but not long enough, day of evading the guard and fun in the sun, Zelos walked back to the hotel.

_Back at last! Damn I love this beach. I just spent the whole day there! Twas fun. Total number of girls hitting on me: 6 total number of jealous boyfriends: 6. Level of visable happiness: HIGH. Success on evading guards: I did a damn good job of it, if I do say so myself. And I'm kinda tired now, oddly enough. So I'm hittin the light. Tomorrow I'm going gamblin. Then I'll probably hafta come home. Just Great. Only two freaking days here. Oh the joy. Damn you slow travel service!_

**7 days till Seles' Birthday**

_Spent almost all of today so far in the movie theater. Watching a good one. These movies suck, really. All the same crappy horror flick with the same kinds of people in them. Yawn. So bored. Couldn't go to beach. Damn guard. Anyway, goin to the casino later. Gonna bet my lifesavings away. Not like their useful or anything. I have crappy luck when it comes to betting. I like picking the ones with high chances of coming out in my favor, but I never get a good pay out. Risk it on low odds, or just try for a quick win...always a tough decision. _

_More random crap! Four members of ZHA tried to pick me up again. Didn't work, cause their boyfriends found out, and/or I was too bored to talk to them. Something like that. I forget. Why is it that all these people forget their boyfriends around me…other than me being the chosen. Which is probably the only reason they act this way. I wish these chicks would treat me normally. I know if I said half this stuff and I wasn't chosen, I'd be slapped and worse…I've only seen maybe one person act normally and she's long gone. But screw it anyway._

_HOORAY! The casino's open now! Ciao!_

Zelos rushed down the stairs and took the free tram ride to the Casino. He soon walked into the casino, in all its sparkly glory. A winner here, a loser theee, and some drunk guy laughing at his machine. Zelos laughed at this one guy who had somehow managed to get this jackpot on the slots…only to not have it pay out…the machine was either out of coins or it suddenly froze…man was this guy pissed though! Zelos made his way over to the Roulette table.

He pondered the odds. He turned over in his head what he should bet After a minute of deliberation, he put 100 gald on red. You know, something simple to start the day with. The roulette worker (A/N forgot what thee guys are called) put the little white ball and the betters, 5 now, watched in awe as the ball leaped and jumped and spun its way around the wheel. After a few moments the ball slowly began to stop and it came to rest in one of the boxes.

"16 red." 3 of the gamblers stormed off, as they bet on black. One of the remaining bet on 16 and got quadruple his bet, and he skipped of joyously to the bar. Zelos only got double his bet, and he smiled, gave the roulette worker a hug, and walked over to another wheel

This time, Zelos did something a bit different. What was the big deal of losing a few hundred gald when he had several billion more at home? He thought a moment, and put his two hundred gald on 20 black. The bet taker looked at him oddly, then waited for a few more takers, about 7 this time.

Again the ball spun in the wheel. Again the gamblers looked on in awe and nervousness. Until the ball finally stopped. They looked at the number in slight awe.

"Black 20." Half the gamblers stalker off, a few received payment on color bets or even ones. The attendent joyfully gave Zelos 64,000 gald n chips, which he immediately cashed in.

He stayed a few more minutes, stopping to eat dinner and schmooze. A few of the bunnies started to giggle at him and he smiled joyfully at them. After a little while more he walked back triumphantly to the hotel.

_I won 64,000 gald in roulette! I can't believe it! Now that I think of it…what if they are rigging the system so it matches my be? it does make some sense. They can't have THE chosen loose, so they make it so I always win. I suppose losing might not be so bad…hell no! Winning is fun! Ehh I'll ponder the ethics of rigging the system in my favor some other time. Anyway…_

_It's only a week till Seles' birthday! She's gonna be 14! I hope she's ok…and that the letter's actually being mailed. I mean, there's a snowball's chance in hell that she gets it in time. And it'll be a cold day in Altamira if she's even allowed to leave that abbey for more than a day or so. _

_Tomorrow's my last day here. Then it's a freaking five day trip to Meltokio! Joy!_

**6 day's till Seles' Birthday**

_Last day here. I went to the beach again..hit on people again…same ole same ole. Sat on that beach for almost half the day again. Had some more good food..sushi. I think…Anyway, now we hafta pack so we can leave. Packing sucks ass. So does a lot of things. But I won't get into that list now. Too annoying, too sad, and frankly, it doesn't even matter anymore. I'll write again once we get back to Meltokio._

_

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_Well that's chapter three. Next chapter will be him meeting the group and the planning of it all. Could take a little while._  
_


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